The Epic Saga of the Chosen One. Part 1
by Cannoli

 

A Complete Fourth Age Text on Tarmon Gaidon & the World's Savior
Collaboratively assembled by the White Tower's Committee of Public Information, with the aid of many notable scholars who know on which side their bread is buttered.

1. In the Last Days, all was as Darkness. And Men cried out to the Creator saying "Light of Heaven, send us a Chosen One who will guide us through the evils ahead!" And it came to be that the True Chosen was Birthed in a place between Two Rivers. And it is said that the fluids which gushed forth upon the Birthing were so perfect, they were as sweet as wine, and did cause a spring to flow from where they splattered on the ground. And ever after, the Winespring Water did flow from the exalted place of the Chosen One's arrival on Earth.

And all was quiet for many years. And the peoples of the lands between the Two Rivers were small-minded and grubby, and only lowly farmer scum, they were at peace, and truly blessed, for among them walked the Chosen One. And miracles abounded, and former desert of the land between the Rivers was made lush & green, with forests and flowing waters, bountiful crops and fluffy sheep. And the wars and plagues which had tormented the sinful people were ceased, though they did not deserve it, for they were ignorant & unappreciative of the Chosen One in their midst, and did not treat the Chosen One with the appropriate respect. But the Chosen One forgave, because she was just that good. What? Yes, she. The Chosen One was a female of course. This art verily a True history, none of that pap the ignorant Masses believe!

And the Chosen One knew in her heart that she was destined for greatness and higher things than a village that smelled of sheep. And it came to pass that there was a man who would be known as the Dragon Reborn, and the Chosen One saw that he needed her aid and guidance, and so she arranged that they should be wed one day, for truly, the man necessary for the salvation of the world was surely deserving of the hand of the Chosen One. And knowing her greatness in all things, and her ability to miraculously Heal all wounds, the so-called Wisdom of that village came unto the Chosen One and begged her for aid, for her bits of plant were stupid and useless. And the Wisdom was cunning & full of guile, and to claim the glory & honors for herself, suggested the Chosen One pose as a mere apprentice. And the Chosen One did, for she was just that humble. Truly it is a marvel how great the Chosen One is.

And so it came to pass that the Prophet of the Chosen One came unto the wondrous village of the Chosen One's birth. And she did identify those who were marked as Troublemakers by the Pattern, and she saw through the vile treacherous cunning of the Wisdom, and mocked her and called her "child" and verily, it was no more than the false Wisdom deserved. And the Shadow rose up and smote the village, and destroyed the homes of the Three Troublemakers, but the power of the Chosen One protected her home, their true target, for she was wise and forewarned of the attack by the incoherent babblings of the Troublemakers. And it came to pass that the father of the Dragon was struck down, and the Chosen One miraculously conjured him & his son to the village to be safe in her presence. And the Chosen One sent her Prophet to Heal the father of the Dragon, for she was wise and merciful. But the Prophet wept, for she was inadequate to the task, and she sent a thought to the Chosen One beseeching aid, and the Chosen One was kind, and worked through her Prophet to Heal the father of the Dragon.

And the Chosen One had decided that the times called for her to go forth and take her rightful place in the world and receive the honors due her, but she had observed the ineptitude of the Prophet and the inadequacy of the Troublemakers, and was moved to pity and bestowed upon them the favor of her company. And though her horse was merely ordinary, with the Chosen One on her back, she sped through the night, and the breeze of her passage carried the Prophet & the Troublemakers behind. And they crossed the Taren River and upon the Chosen One disembarking from the ferry, it was swallowed up by the waters, lest it should ever have to bear a lesser passenger than the Chosen One. And indeed, many boats on which the Chosen One set foot would sink due to the honor and so that lesser people would never again command the use of a boat so blessed as to carry her.

And as they camped so that the Chosen One's weary companions might rest, the Prophet beseeched the Chosen One to come to the White Tower and honor it by taking the shawl of an Aes Sedai. But the Dragon was sore vexed and jealous, and vowed that he would thwart the White Tower and the Chosen One and her Prophet for the rest of days. Soon after this, the Chosen One undid her braid, for she had never wanted so restrictive a hair-style. Yea, her tresses should flow free as the Creator had made them, but she had worn the braid to humor the simple dirt-people among whom she had spent her early years. Verily, she had never wanted to wear her hair that way. And the Guardian of the Prophet, and the Jester who made the Chosen One laugh & clap her hands both began to teach the Three Troublemakers such skills as they had with weapons, for the protection of the Chosen One and with musical instruments and devices for amusement, so that they might keep the Chosen One entertained. And the Prophet saw the Chosen One was pleased, though she herself required no lessons. Instead they went off alone that the Chosen One might set the Prophet straight on the occasional error the Prophet in her mortal fallibility committed.

And it came to pass that they arrived in a town called Baerlon. And the Troublemakers were much impressed, though the Chosen One knew it was a mere town, and not a fraction of the city known in those days as Tar Valon, and in our day as Egweneton. Yea, even then, the Chosen One knew that she had outgrown a small town such as Baerlon. And in that town, they met a woman who was a Seer. And she was overproud of her gift of seeing trivial, insignificant things. But when she saw the Chosen One, she was struck full of jealousy and attempted to beguile the Dragon that she might win his heart and seed, which the Chosen One did not really want anyway. And the Chosen One was fine with this, for she was only engaged to the Dragon as a favor to him. And while they stayed at the inn, the false Wisdom arrived, for she had been driven from the village when they discovered that she could not Heal nor tell the weather nor anything useful with the Chosen One gone. And she seduced the Guardian of the Prophet with her wanton sensuality, and thus the Prophet agreed to take her along. And as they left the inn, the Dragon, being the little sissy-boy he was, was frightened by a shadow, not having faith that he could come to no harm under the protection of the Chosen One. And the inn caught fire, for the Chosen One had slept beneath its roof, and there was nothing that could equal such an honor again. And the Whitecloaks did try to accost them at the gate, but the Chosen One turned her Prophet into a giant, who stepped over the gate and frightened them. And though the experience befuddled the Prophet, the Chosen One kindly explained to her what happened.

And as they journeyed to the White City, the forces of the Shadow did try to stop them, but they were no match for the Chosen One's lesser servants, let alone the Chosen One herself. But her servants grew tired, so she direct them to a ruined city called Shadar Logoth to rest it. And she sensed the evil taint of the place when they entered, and she saw right away how to rid it of its taint, and incidentally, spare all men from going mad of the taint on saidin caused by their arrogance in trying to be equals of Aes Sedai. But it was a trivial task, and she was concerned for the Troublemakers who wandered off, seeking treasure to lay at her feet for a gift. And the one called Mat, who harbored a deep love for her, e'en though he did usually express it most immaturely, found a wondrous dagger, but they fled the city in terror before he had a chance to present the dagger to her. And the Chosen One had to leave as well to save them from their folly.

And the Chosen One decided to follow the simplest and least clever of them, called Perrin. She sent her entertainer to watch over the other two Troublemakers, and knew her Prophet & Guardian could take care of themselves, and she even commended the false Wisdom to their care, for the Chosen One could forgive all. And the Chosen One and Perrin found a wild, savage hungry man who talked with wolves. And the Chosen One gave him food. And she saw that Perrin was sad for it seemed that all folk he met had special powers, and he had none, so she taught him the rather useless skill of talking to wolves, which she disdained to do. And they did find a caravan of simple people who nonetheless recognized the greatness of the Chosen One. And she abided with them for a while, teaching them a way of peace and gentleness. And she met among them a man who was kind and sweet and not at all violent like the Troublemakers to whom she was accustomed. And she knew that he at least would always stay on the path of righteousness, and she gave him her blessing. And the young women sought to impress her with their dancing, and she suggested that their virtue would be better preserved if they did keep their clothing on while doing the dances. And she did verily tighten up their choreography a bit. And the elder woman among them, called Ila, sought her counsel on womanly matters, and the Chosen One gave her much good advice. And after a time they left the simple folk, only to be captured by the Whitecloaks who hated and feared her power and glory. And they struck and bullied her companion, and sought to kill her wolf-friends, but dared not lay hands on her. And she grew weary of seeing Perrin hit all the time, and so she summoned her Prophet who came in the midst of a great Storm created by the Chosen One, and her Guardian helped carry Perrin away, for he was sore afflicted, but judged the cost to be well worth the privilege of attending the Chosen One. And they went to Caemlyn, where they did meet the other two Troublemakers, to whom nothing important had happened, unless you count the perfidy of the Dragon's continual lusting after other women along the length & breadth of his journey, particularly those whose names began & ended with the same letter as the Mighty and Unspeakable Name of the Chosen One. The wretched male did even climb the walls of the Palace in Caemlyn to ogle the Daughter-Heir, for her beauty even approached the same category as the Chosen One, if falling notably short of her standards, though her mother came close. But the Chosen One was munificent in her generosity and kindness and forgave him. And she did also recommend the Prophet see to the mild illness which Mat had contracted from licking his dagger without properly cleaning it, after it had lain in the germs of Shadar Logoth for two millennia. And it came to pass that they wondered what to do next, but the Chosen One knew, for she had heard a story from her followers among the caravan of Traveling People, and she suggested to the Prophet that they seek the Eye of the World. And the Troublemakers invented stories of their own revelations, seeking to steal attention and glory from the Chosen One. And so the went to seek the Eye of the World. But that is another tale...

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