AMoL Chapter 23: Misunderstandings
by Paetram
[Three days into their search for the Tower of Ghenjei, Mat Cauthon and his companions stop in a small village to get their bearings.]
Thom: Mat, there's a letter for you.
Mat: Moiraine?
Thom: No, from your Princess. She wanted me to give it to you at the first town.
Mat: Why am I more worried than if it had been from Moiraine? [Reading.]
Dearest,
No common room wenches while I'm gone or I'll kill you.
Love,
Tuon
Mat: Burn her! She doesn't trust me!
Thom: [Nods.]
[Just at that moment, Mat spies a pretty young woman walking out of an inn.]
Mat: [Grinning at the woman.] Hello. I'm the Prince of the Ravens.
Woman: [Laughing.] Yes, I know.
Mat: You do? Well, do you know anything about this? [Mat shows her a crude sketch of the Tower of Ghenjei.]
Woman: [Laughing harder.] I'm not sure. It sure is big.
Mat: Yes, and it's very important to me. I can pay you very well if you know something about it.
Woman: I'm not certain what you're insinuating, my lord, but I was told to give this to a man matching your description and calling himself "Prince of the Ravens." [She hands Mat a sealed letter.]
Mat: [Reading.]
Dearest Mat,
In Seanchan, we pride ourselves on our highly effective forms of torture. I have selected one in particular for you when I return, in case you decide to continue your romantic adventures.
Your affectionate,
Tuon
Mat: [Swallowing hard.] Never mind.
[Mat and company enter the inn.]
Mat: [Speaking to a buxom serving girl.] Hello, I'm a very important lord, and I'm looking for this. [Mat shows her the drawing.] It's a tower. Have you seen it?
Girl: An important lord, you say? Well, if you come up to my room we can talk at length about this tower of yours, my fine lord.
[Smiling wickedly, the girl turns to walk upstairs. After a minute of indecision, Mat reluctantly follows. On the landing, Mat sees an open doorway. Just inside the darkened room two glaring eyes peer out.]
Mat: [Muttering to himself.] No, it can't be her. Impossible. [Mat walks into the room.]
[Launching a devastating kick, Selucia knocks Mat to the floor and locks her thighs around his neck.]
Mat: [Gasping] Well, this is it. I'm dead. Again.